Simplify by Listening.

Just for today, make the choice to listen a little more closely to the voice of the Spirit.  Just a few minutes ago I was talking with my husband on his lunch break and spilling to him the worries and troubles from my heart.  In his wise and wonderful way, he asked me to do 2 things for him.

#1. Follow the Spirit.  He asked me to do what I am prompted to do for the Spirit will lead me to do things that will comfort and uplift my soul.

#2. Be comforted.  He promised me that because of prayers and faith the Lord would seek to comfort me today.  But I must let the comfort in.  I must choose to feel the comfort He will inevitably provide for me.

And then he asked me to have faith.  So I promised I would do these things, he told me he loved me, and we said goodbye.

Now it has been 25 minutes since I hung up the phone and I am already witnessing miracles from acting on the two simple suggestions from my sweetheart.  I know that I will only witness more as the day goes on.

Thank you, Sweetie, for your words and wisdom.  And thank Thee, Father, for the miracles.

Would you care to take the challenge as well?  I can only attest that miracles will follow--even if they are small and simple.  They will come.  They have for me...

Call Mother.

Some days when the world is swirling, all we need to do is pick up the phone and call our mothers.  It is she who cradled us as infants, she who cradled our growing-up dreams, and she who will still be there to cradle our hearts when we most need it.  Thank you, Mother, for always being there for me. 
I love you.

Happy Challenge:

Call your mom today to tell her you love her and to thank her for everything she has done for you in your life.  And when the days are stormy, call her for comfort or advice.  She will always be there.  And if she has already passed through this life and into the realms of the next, talk to her in your heart.  Heaven is so much closer than we think.

When you hit a roadblock.

My husband and I were asked to speak in church on Sunday.  The topic is perfect, and I have so many points jotted down on a little white notecard.

But today when I sat down and thought about how I could pull it all together and organize my ideas, my mind went blank.  I sat and thought and prayed for nearly a half an hour.  Nothing.  So I followed the prompting to go about my daily tasks with my talk on my mind.

And though I desperately want to put my thoughts together in a cohesive, inspiring way right now, I know that the Lord will help me--in His own way and in His own time.  He always does.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." -Isaiah 55:8-9

Happy Challenge:

When you need a solution, but don't feel like the answers are coming, trust your problem, your concerns, your worries to the Lord and let Him solve in His own, perfect way.  Trust His timing.  It's the only way to feel peace and joy in the midst of waiting.  Someday the rock will be removed.

Bad Day or Prelude to a Happy Day?

Sometimes I tend to think that a bad day signals the end of the world.  But it doesn't.  A bad day can be just that--a bad day.  Not the end of the world.  And not a bad life.  Sorrows or anger or anxiety swarm around and snuff out happiness like a little candle.  But I mustn't forget that a snuffed-out candle today could become a blazing fire tomorrow.  Like a beautiful classical piece of music, today's bad day could really just be a prelude (written in a minor key) to tomorrow's grand finale (written in a major one).

Yes, for the most part, we can choose to be happy, but some days are just bad.  We need to accept them for what they are, do our very best, and then wake up tomorrow and try again.   Because tomorrow may be the greatest day ever.  Hope for this.  And let your thinking change for the better, even if today doesn't.

Happy Challenge:

Instead of trying to change your day around, just change your perspective.  Remind yourself again and again that today is just a prelude to tomorrow's miraculous day.  Then watch and see if happiness doesn't unfold, because it will.  And maybe even your bad day prelude will change a little too from the coloring of your hope...

photo credit

Sunlight Breakthrough

On those mornings when you can't wake up, when the only thing you want to do is crawl right back under the covers and sleep for 8 more hours.  On those days when you feel terribly un-rested, when you feel no different than when you climbed in bed the night before, can you expect or even dream of a happy-filled day?

The answer is, yes.  A resounding yes indeed.

That is, if you turn to Him.

Perhaps it is on these days of sheer exhaustion, when we feel so small and helpless, when the Lord's grace makes the most difference.  We plead with him on tired knees, bowing a heavy head, and then we reach down deep to muster all the faith we have.  And then we wait.  We wait upon the Lord.

Have you ever noticed that the mornings that start out with a storm, or a light rainfall, are often the most glorious days?  For some reason, the sun breaking through the wool-gray clouds is even more radiant than just a regular sunrise.  Maybe it's the contrast of dark to light that is so inspiring.  Or maybe we just appreciate the sun a little more when we've had a dose of rain.  Whatever the reason, let's make the resolve to make today brilliant...even if it started out a little rough.  We can only do this by trusting our whole day to the Master of the Universe. 


For it is He alone who can make for us this resplendent transformation....

Happy Challenge:

Next time your day starts out with a storm, pray and wait upon the Lord.  Then notice the resplendence when His light breaks through your clouds of fatigue.  Treasure this day and record it to always remember.


image source

Finding Light {My Battle Part 2}

It was towards the end of March that I finally decided to reach out for help.  My husband had asked me on numerous occasions if I wanted him to call my mom and seek out a doctor.  I turned him down each time, believing that I would get better if I just gave it more time.

I had tried exercising more frequently, changing my daily routine a dozen times, eliminating distracting activities...the list went on and on.  And while each of these solutions were good and should have helped, they didn't.  I realized that it was my body's hormones and not my external factors that needed a revamp.

But there were so many days that I wished I didn't even exist...for no tangible, logical reason.  My life was perfect, but I felt in the depths of despair.  Even the warm spring and the sunshine outside, which usually served to bolster me and fuel my joy, only made me feel like crawling up in a corner to cry.  The worst part of the depression seemed to hit me in the mornings.  Every morning the weight of the day would hit me like a ton of bricks the second I opened my eyes.  Sleep was my only escape from the terrible feelings of guilt, sadness, and despair.

In the last week of March I finally accepted my sweetheart's suggestions.  He called my mom because I was too sad to admit that I was depressed.  She immediately reached out and called me.  She found a doctor and I set up an appointment.  This was the turning point for me.  She prescribed a serotonin re-uptake inhibitor and I began faithfully taking the medicine.  It took a few weeks to fully kick-in, so to speak, but I found myself experiencing fewer and fewer bad days as time went on.

I continued to practice life-enhancing habits and did my best to eat and drink right.  I began taking afternoon naps with my little ones and found my days gradually normalizing.  I remember in April there was a day that I finally felt like my normal self.  At first these days were sporadic and unpredictable, but eventually they became the majority.

In May I noticed progress.  I noted that my afternoons began to be happier, and little by little, the hour got earlier that I would begin feeling happy.  Noon for a few days, then 11:00, then 10:00.  By June--I hit a landmark.  I was finally waking up happy.  I waited a few weeks and started to feel like my normal self again.  I am just now tapering off the medication and it feels so wonderful to be alive.

While the medication was definitely a catalyst in my progress, there was a spiritual power that activated it.  I truly learned how to call on my Heavenly Father moment by moment for grace and strength beyond my own to face the feats before me.  It was revolutionary and it has changed me forever...this calling upon Him for grace.  Early this year I had been contemplating how I could come to know my Savior better.  Truly, this was the answer.

Do I feel embarrassed, saddened, or bitter that this whole experience of postpartum depression happened to me?  No. 

Though it was excruciatingly difficult, I know that the Lord pulled me from the abyss.  As I learned to rely on Him more, and use the resources He put in my path, my burden was lifted.  And now as I gaze out at the sunlight falling on the summer countryside, I am truly happy.  And I know that even though I feel much like my normal self, I will never be exactly the same.  I am different now.  More refined, stronger than I was, and perhaps, a little more like Him.

The Dark Days {My Battle Part 1}

{image via pinterest}

It was sometime in the middle of February that it hit me. Like a ton of bricks crashing down on my inner peace.  It was the bane of postpartum depression.

My little angel girl was born at the end of November, shortly after my younger sister got married and my sweet mother underwent a major thoracotomy (lung surgery).  And though the first few months of juggling two rowdy boys and a brand new infant were trying, life was peaceful and exciting.

In December we moved to a new state and into a beautiful, antique, renovated farmhouse cottage.  Christmas came and we gathered our little ones around our tree in love and joy.

In January my sweetheart began his second to last affiliation in a city about 45 minutes from our house, and simultaneously threw himself into intensive study for his boards of physical therapy which we would be taking in March.  We began desperately searching for a job, knowing that he would graduate in May and we would need some way to provide for our growing family.  I tried to deal with these circumstances the best I knew how, but one day, I finally just snapped.

It was too much stress, too much pressure, too many new changes and worries.  I tried to ignore the feelings of depression I was having.  I tried to shrug them off and be happy anyway.  I tried to be the best mother I could be, and a support to my husband.  I tried to perform my regular duties with a positive attitude.  But nothing was working.  I didn't want anyone to know I was struggling, for fear they would think I was a failure, or that I wasn't strong enough to handle three children.

Life came and went for the next several months.  Stresses intensified when my husband felt like he had failed his boards and we anticipated the awful waiting until July for the next licensure exam, wondering how we would ever support our family when our loan money ran out in May.  But things resolved themselves, as they often do.  The Lord gave us tender mercy after tender mercy.  My sweetheart miraculously passed his boards, he was given a promising job, and things began to turn brighter--externally.  But internally I was still battling an immense amount of sadness that I couldn't explain.

What was I to do?  Where was I to turn?  I felt like I had fallen in a deep, dark hole that I couldn't climb out of, no matter how hard I tried.  Would I ever be free?  Would I ever feel like my normal, enthusiastic, in love with life, happy self?

{And for fear that this post is getting too long, I will finish my story in tomorrow's post....}